This has nothing to do with Magnolia, but we felt that this video was worth sharing. Living in the Bay Area, it is sometimes easy to forget that discrimination against our gay brothers and sisters is still very much still alive. Bullying of gay youth has led to numerous suicides this past year, leading this courageous city council member in Fort Worth, TX, to leap out of his comfort zone and try to change the situation by sharing his story. It is one worth hearing to remember that it is all of our responsibility to challenge discrimination and oppression whether we are the ones facing it or not.
Young people are the best mirrors to the oppression in our society. They internalize it, act upon it, even attempt to perpetuate it. The bullies don’t know any better than to act upon what they notice in their surroundings. The bullied, if oppressive systems aren’t directly challenged at their homes, internalize the oppressive statements and act upon them.
Eva certainly sees it at her school, where many of the young African-American students are surrounded by messages of the inferiority of their people – of their limited societal worth – and internalize it by turning on each other and disregarding the value of the education they are receiving.
It’s up to all of us to behave as allies and work together to dismantle oppression. This is a conversation that, especially white allies, are often reluctant to have, but one necessary if we are to work towards a more just world.
We decided, since we have this widely read (49 people the other day!!!) blog, that we would take this opportunity to try to trigger this important conversation.
What are you doing, or what would you like to do, to contribute to the dismantling of systems of oppression in your community?
That’s the face of leadership. Man.
The other day, my son came home from school with a story about this one kid in his class who was getting bullied. We talked about what we could do about this. He asked me to talk to his teacher (who organized a session with their excellent guidance counselor).
But my son’s problem wasn’t just concern for his classmate. He was also really disturbed by what his friends were doing, not “just” the effect it was having on the bullied child. And he was disturbed by his own failure to respond each time, to accept it, to almost take it for granted. I think the almost-taking-it-for-granted part was what really shook him.
So, we talked about that, too. And he decided that what he wanted to do was talk to some of his closest friends who were doing some of the bullying. So, he did.
And, yes, it sounds like a fairy tale, or made-for-TV-movie, but these two other boys immediately agreed (when does that EVER happen? well, never, if you don’t let it, if you don’t try) that:
“oh! yeah! what we’re doing IS bullying!” and “let’s ask T. [yes, I changed the letter] to play on our team at recess!”
I don’t expect everyone to live happily ever after; it’s real life, after all. But that’s the point. This is it. Right here. This is the real life. Not tomorrow. And what we do right now counts.
Thanks for posting this.
Thanks for sharing your story Paulina!
Your conversation with your son probably changed those bullies’ lives. Kids absorb all sorts of messages and, unless they are challenged early, they turn them into oppressive behaviors that last a lifetime.
Thanks for teaching your son to be such a leader!
My main exposure to anti-oppression has come through working on climate justice issues, yet I usually feel pretty disconnected from oppression in the every-day, in-your-face interpersonal sense unless it’s organizational gender dynamics or inadequate representation of minorities in our efforts (not to discount those things).
That’s because a lot of the work I’ve been doing is remote and removed from poverty, violence, and other issues that riddle parts of even my immediate community here in DC.
Which is why I’m excited to be beginning a new type of activism, one that is immediate and in-your-face and also one that demands that I be “the change I wish to see in the world”.
The organization YogaActivist.org connects practicing yogis with communities who might not otherwise receive yoga.
A year ago, I might have raised an eyebrow at this kind of mission statement- I tend to compartmentalize social and spiritual endeavors. But now I’m realizing the very pragmatic reasons why sharing yoga with under-served communities makes sense. It’s like that old proverb about teaching someone to fish. We can’t hand someone empowerment or self-worth in a tangible form. But we can share a practice that will help people find those things on their own, in whatever way is most meaningful to them.
I came to this conclusion in a few different instances. First, while I was reading ‘Dharma and Development’ by Joanna Macy To paraphrase, the book uses the Sarvodaya Self-Help Movement in Sri Lanka to talk about 1) the importance of building local human capacity in international development efforts, and 2) the overall goal of development being human fulfillment … creating conditions for dignity. We can’t guarantee that fulfillment or dignity will come with higher literacy rates or lower birth rates or larger GDP (although those might be strong indicators). It’s an internal feeling.
I also had a really affirming and eye-opening experience this week that has made me consider the role of healing in outreach work. Walking home late one night, I was asked by two young girls to help them find a place to stay for the night- they were 12 and 13 and decided to leave home together after a series of episodes involving domestic violence, neglect, and sexual abuse. It was startling to encounter these two young women with no real plan or resources trying to find help, and challenging to figure out the best way to help.
The experience made me realize the limitations that legal, medical, and governmental services face in providing emotional healing in.
To me, these realizations just underscores the importance of taking accountability for my role as a member of my immediate community, and in doing so, all the broader communities (ex. nation, planet) to which I belong.
I used to think this sort of perspective was insufficient and a cop-out, but now I know it’s the only way we can truly guarantee human liberty and fulfillment.
You should check out Fairfield, Iowa then.